I’ve Fallen And I Can’t Get Up

So I was walking to baggage claim at the Portland, OR airport on Monday afternoon and I heard this announcement over the PA:

There has been a walker left at gate A2. If you are missing your walker please return to gate A2 to claim it.


The Captain Could Be Yours

After a bit of dicking around cuz of ebay’s uncoolness The Captain is back up for grabs

I’ve been growing The Captain (that’s what I’ve named my moustache) since December 10th of 2005. This was before I saw that show My Name is Earl, so I didn’t copy that guy. Except for one trimming, the moustache has not been cut or tampered with that I know of. That means you get 100% Grade A unfettered or maligned moustache. That’s hot and a good deal no matter what you’re talking about!

Calling All AAARRGH-O-Nauts

I’m not kidding here. Make sure your speakers are turned on:

AAARRGH!! combines the attitude and sense of fun of POP ART with serious, results-based best rated treadmills under $500 and fitness training to help each client achieve the improbable: improved health, renewed vigor, a fuller appreciation of life, and best of all, the cartoonish physique you dare to dream about.Did you ever wish you could be larger-than-life, like Jayne Mansfield wreaking havoc just walking down the street in THE GIRL CAN’T HELP IT? The aim of AAARRGH!! is to help each client achieve his own level of confidence and star quality.If you want to be an Incredible Hulk man-monster, an idealized, flawless Captain America, a sleek Spiderman or even a subtle, still-waters-run- deep Clark Kent, we can relate.

We’re there to support you and help you achieve the comic book hero that’s already inside you, just waiting to be unleashed upon an unsuspecting world!!

Go forth and conquer…

Oilman Bows To Public Pressure

Well enough of you moaned, bitched, cried, whined, complained, grumbled, groused, griped, muttered, lamented, carped, ranted, protested, objected, and whinged about the last incarnation of my blog. So fine…you win. Enjoy the new design you buncha jerks.

v7ndotcom elursrebmem Contest Results Part I

Well – I guess today is the big day. Unfortunately my cohort WebGuerrilla is on the road today so we’ll announce our official winners tomorrow. However since the contest officially closes today I’ve taken a screenshot that we will as the official standings: I have also grabbed copies of the top 3 results from the Google cache so there can be no monkey business tonight. Tomorrow Greg will run some verification on the linking rules and we’ll announce the official winners and award prizes appropriately. John Scott has announced his winners as well and asked for them to send over their paypal addresses. Tune in tomorrow to this blog and listen to SEO Rockstars at 4pm PST where we’ll announce the winners on air. Also, we’ve most of tomorrow’s show will be a live discussion between Danny Sullivan and Matt Cutts. Don’t miss it.

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I haven’t done anything contest related for a bit now…. v7ndotcom elursrebmem v7ndotcom elursrebmem v7ndotcom elursrebmem v7ndotcom elursrebmem

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That oughta do it right? 😉

Cosby Sweaters and Jell-O Shots

Turns out that Cosby Sweater parties are all the rage these days. Dig through the closet or the local thrift store for that old sweater and mix up some jell-o shots and you’re ready to rock and roll.

To that end some of my colleagues and friends got together and had their own party back in December. On of the attendees is a new SEO at Range Online Media, by the name of Kerry Dean, decided to put his new found SEO skills to work and get the picture page ranked.

End result: a film crew from TVLand/Nick@Nite are headed out there to interview the organizers and some attendees.

It’s an interesting world we live in.


I mean….Really WTF!!?? jeez

V7N Comedy

zoinks scooby!!

The brain trust at V7N is was having a discussion about why Google doesn’t sponsor this SEO contest and V7N ambassodor Michael Allison posted this:

Google will learn a lot from this. They are nothing, if not astute.


I wondered why google didn’t post a big prize and let the gloves come off so they could study every aspect of it. Then it occurred to me that they could study this one and stay well away from any controversy.

Anybody in the room that thinks for 2 seconds that Google will learn anthing at all from a buncha link whores fighting over a gibberish phrase for the next 120 days please stand up so I can throw goldfish crackers at you.

v7ndotcom elursrebmem

Well there you have it. Old news I know but I’ve been on the road the last few days so I’m really only blogging it for all you folks subscribed to my rss 😉 It should be pointed out tho that Johnny-boy Scott went and changed his rules as the last minute so that Greg, Mike and I will still have to pay out even if someone puts an unlinked banner on the page for John’s forum. Clever John. We could easily bail out at this point and save face by saying it’s not the same contest anymore but we’er bigger men than that beside I fully intend to win my own money and John’s which I’ll use to run a tab at whatever the next Search Conference is and simply blow the wad on my friends and whoever else happens to be in the bar at that point in time. I’ll do it too. Want a beer? Help me win – just link to this post – that will work fine…oh wait…[oilman rummages around his desk]…here it is…Matt Cutts…now I’m officially entered. Let’s all try and prove once and for all who the best seo is by ranking for a term that currently shows absolutely no friggin results at all on Google. ADDED: veeesevenenn – might as well go for his money too