I’m A Twit

yep – I swallowed the blue pill and signed up for twitter. I gotta say it’s kinda like crack. I now know that Danny is at Disneyland and going on rides and that Vanessa is having ziti for Buffy night. My life is measurably better now. For those of you that care you can follow me at www.twitter.com/oilman.

Ever Wonder How Google Employees Report Spam?

Well they have their own internal spam reporting tools of course. If you work at Google you simply type http://spamreport/ into your G branded FireFox browser and voila. I can’t say I’ve actually seen what’s at that internal URL but I can tell you it’s highly promoted and visible around the ‘plex and around multi monitors. When I was there a couple weeks back with Greg he swiped the scanned document below off a bulletin board and in a round about sort of way I swiped it from him – hehe. Did I say swiped? no. It was on the floor and I’m sure it was near a garbage can. How much you wanna bet that Matt himself did the fancy artwork?

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Rollin Like a Rockstar

When I’m on the road and generally hangin with my fellow rockstar it’s all about how we roll. We drink top shelf booze, ride around in limos, get invited to cool pre-launch events and private parties, get to wander around the Googleplex stealing the http://spamreport posters and looking for booze and all manner of other rockstarish things. It’s how we roll…until we get home. I’ve been home all weekend and here’s how we roll on the Friesen homestead:

  • swimming lessons – I have to go in the pool with the kids
  • cleaned the garage – 3 hours
  • washed the wife’s minivan – my truck is still filthy
  • mowed the lawn
  • hung pictures
  • mounted smoke detectors in the kids rooms full of inflammable toys
  • fixed the broken gate latch
  • cleaned the bbq
  • watched Bob the Builder, My Little Pony, Caillou, Dora the Explorer and more
  • took the kids to the pumpkin patch to pick pumpkins (that will rot on my doorstep)
  • changed various burned out light bulbs
  • read books while a 2 yr tried poopin on the potty again and again
  • organized the recycling bins

And that my friends is how I roll. Now I’m off to watch Veggie Tales…

The Good, The Bad, and The Downright Shitty

I watch a fair bit of TV. I have 2 little kids so by the time we’ve fought through dinner and baths and clean up and snacks and video and bedtime stories about all I have left in me is enough energy to crack a beer or three and collapse in the La-Z-Boy and let big media have it’s way with me. The show I’m currently watching it on the downright shitty list so I felt a summary recent brain melting activity was in order. Some shows are new and some are old series  I’ve been catching up on.

  • Bionic Woman – new – shitty
  • My Name is Earl – new season – as fun as ever
  • The Unit – new season – Go Joe!!
  • Battlestar Galactica – the new one – lovin it but I always want them to have better technology. C’mon you can travel at lightspeed but you can’t sort out a planet with out a paper map?
  • Angel – recently finished the whole series – fantastic – killer final episode
  • Heroes – Season 1 – just over half way through – way too cool
  • Prison Break – compelling and can’t stop watching it but way to unreal
  • Private Practice – gave it whirl cuz let’s face it she’s hot – thumbs down on this crappy spin off
  • Corner Gas – best thing Canada ever produced. Tax Man is the funniest thing you’ve ever seen.
  • Pathfinder – movie – complete and utter suckage – totally shit on a stick horrible flick (but I did watch it all the way through)
  • 5 second video of cheerleader getting run over by a whole football team smashing through a big piece of paper with their logo on it – funny shit and could watch over and over again

Oilman Now Powered By Feedburner

yeah yeah yeah – I know. It’s about damn time. Click below to update your feed to the new Feedburner URL. Really I just want to see high numbers in the Feedburner doohicky at the bottom of the right sidebar ;) Subscribe to Oilman on Feedburner

Vanessa Needs Our Help

It would seem that Vanessa has some email issues and eventually gets to the point of being so overloaded that she’ll declare “e-mail bankruptcy” and simply archive or even delete her entire inbox. She’s not alone. According USA Today this a common problem.

I suggest we help her. Everybody that has her email send her some tips on how to manage the insane flow of email. If you don’t have a tip of your own I’ve dug up a few items that might help:

Tips for Mastering E-mail Overload – HBS Working Knowledge – Explain to them that you’re putting some systems in place to help you manage your e-mail overload. Ask for their help, and know that they’re secretly …

Bit Literacy: Productivity in the Age of Information and E-mail – Bit Literacy, the new book by Mark Hurst, describes how to manage e-mail, todos, photos, a media diet, and other sources of stress for people today. …

Managing Email – Email has become, for many people, the primary way they communicate. … Warning signs that you need to manage your mailbox · Help Users Take Command of …

Critical Section – The Tyranny of Email – Email is one of the greatest things the computer revolution has done for personal productivity. Used improperly, it can also hurt your productivity. …

Web Worker Zen: 5 Ways to Manage Email Stress « Web Worker DailyWhile we’ve covered some great ways to reduce stress before, let’s look specifically at a few different ways to manage email stress, so that you can keep …

Fire up your email app of choice and let’s help our friend. She’s in dire need.

and yes…I’m a dead man after this ;)

added: she’s a plane right now so we have a couple hours to live I figure.

A Joke For Today

This isn’t new but it showed up in my inbox and I can’t stop laughing… After Mr. and Mrs. Ward retired, Mrs. Ward insisted her husband accompany her on her trips to Walmart. Unfortunately, Mr. Ward was like most men–he found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, Mrs. Ward was like most women–she loved to browse. One day Mrs. Ward received the following letter from her local Walmart. Dear Mrs. Ward, Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Ward are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras. 1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people’s carts when they weren’t looking. 2 . July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, “Code 3 in House wares. Get on it right away.” 4. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M’s o n layaway. 5. September 14: Moved a “CAUTION – WET FLOOR” sign to a carpeted area. 6. September 15: Set up a tent in the Gold Coast department and told other shoppers he’d invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department. 7. September 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, “Why can’t you people just leave me alone?” 8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose. 9. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were. 10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ” Mission Impossible” theme. 11. December 6: In the auto department, he practiced his “Madonna look” by using different sizes of funnels. 12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled “PICK ME! PICK ME!” 13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed “OH NO! IT’S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!” And last, but not least . 14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, “Hey! There’s no toilet paper in here!” Regards, Walmart

What Bugs You About Live Search?

Last week MSN launched a bunch of tremendous improvements Live Search. In spite of that there are still 2 major issues that I have with Live Search: depth of crawl and freshness of index.

What bugs you about Live Search?

Boom!!

No word of a lie. This power pole just fell over this morning and nearly pulled the corner of my office right off along with all the flagpoles i had installed. Cops and all showed up to make sure I was still alive and see if I knew there was a problem. Problem? really? I thought that colossal BOOM and subsequent minor earthquake was just a bird hitting the window…

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